A Reasonable Post About Modesty

As the title suggests, this is going to be a reasonable post about modesty. As an almost-twenty-year-old Catholic woman living in the 21st century in the United States, I have standards of modesty. However, these do not conform to the most radical standards held by traditionalist Catholics or by the university culture in which I live. I do not conform to either, nor do I expect other women to conform to either. I think that there are laudable and ridiculous aspects of each, and I have thus placed myself somewhere in between those extremes. I think modesty is a good thing, and I acknowledge that there are many ways in which it can be achieved.

The reason I'm writing about modesty now is because winter doesn't work the same way here in Washington as it does in Connecticut. Back home, November-March is cold, and nobody is tempted to do silly things like walk around in anything less than a socially acceptable outfit, and a coat. Or if they are, the biting winds make them think better of it. Here, the weather is kind of cold from November to mid-February, and then it gets warm. This is lovely for someone who is accustomed to wearing a winter coat until April, but it does inspire some unfortunate sartorial choices in my peers. Particularly among the ladies, but the gentlemen make some regrettable decisions, as well.

I understand and join with my peers in wanting the cold weather to go away as fast as possible so that I can wear my cutest warm weather outfits. After all, I want to look just as nice as the next girl. I've noticed, though, that in their frantic excitement that the ubiquitous D.C. wind is warm today, the women on my campus start forgetting to put on various articles of clothing, by accident, I'm sure. These are small things, like camisoles and t-shirts, but they make all the difference when I can suddenly see a black undergarment through a sheer blouse, or a fluorescent one through a pointelle sweater. I live on a fairly fashion forward campus, but in their rush to be outside on these increasingly beautiful days (especially for a month like February), some essentials appear to have been forgotten in the dresser drawers or the closet.

Now please understand that I do not hold myself faultless in this area, because I know that I have some questionable hemlines and necklines, and the occasional shirt that could be slightly more opaque, but I do try to dress as modestly as I can. Additionally, I don't expect any other women to conform to my standards of dress, but I do expect them to dress themselves with a little more common sense and self-respect.

On that note, I would like to say that I have scoured the internet for some sensible guidelines for modesty, and only came across one today. Most of the websites out there are Christian-run, and while their intentions are admirable, they tend to either throw verses from the Pauline Epistles at you, or inform you of the opinions of holy men and women who lived in times much different from our own. That, or they like to suggest that you look like one of the women in a Land's End catalogue, which is nice if you're old enough to be wearing Land's End clothing, but on a young woman that's just frumpy. And while I appreciate that St. John Chrysostom or St. Padre Pio had an opinion on they way in which women ought to dress themselves, one of those men lived seventeen centuries ago, and the other, though only half a century ago, in a time that still had significantly less relaxed mores than today's society. This is not to say that I reject any guidelines coming from a pope, male saint, priest, etc., but context does matter, and the farther removed a person is from here and now, the less applicable their advice is likely to be.

Having said this, I absolutely do not accept what passes for acceptable with most of society. I don't like undergarments showing, I'm not a fan of cleavage, and for heaven's sake, cover your rear end! I could very easily turn this into a rant, but that would cause a tremendous amount of misery for you, so I won't. What bothers me about so much of women's fashion right now is that fact that so little of it seems to have been designed with the dignity of the woman wearing it in mind. It looks great on the mannequin, but once you put in on the models it looks a whole lot different. As much as modern feminists want to say that this is freedom of expression, to me it looks much more like slavery to the desires of others. Designers charge a ridiculous amount for clothing that barely covers a woman's body, women want to compete to see who looks the hottest, and it doesn't hurt those men who like to look when a woman decides to show a little more thigh or bare a little more cleavage. That doesn't sound like freedom to me, just a lot of outside pressure deciding what you wear for you.

In my humble opinion, a woman should dress herself in a way that makes her look attractive, but doesn't show off her breasts, butt, etc. You're a woman, everyone knows you have these body parts, they don't need to see them. Your apparel should accentuate your beauty as a daughter of God, which means it should show respect for the same. Now I could throw out a hundred verses, like your body being a temple of the Holy Spirit, an exhortation from almost any epistle, something from Psalms, whatever you like, but on their own these are not convincing to most women. The Church says, and I echo this wholeheartedly, that a woman should dress modestly out of respect for herself, for men, and for God. Don't dress in a way that would tempt another woman to call you a whore, tempt a man to whistle or cat-call at you, or would disrespect the beauty God gave you when He created you. Is it difficult sometimes? Sure it is. Is it worth it to be respected, look good, and stay out of sin? Always.